Saturday, March 13, 2010

Promises, promises

I have often promised myself that I would get it all together and blog everyday.  And I break all the promises of course.  If I don't get a blog in, in the morning then it never gets done.  I'm so going to try to blog everyday again.  We'll see.

Love email attachments from people.  They send all sorts of wonderful pictures and jokes, FYIs and other cool things.  Got some new pics this morning.  And a new joke.  Love it.

So just how cold was it in Florida?

And now the joke......

Husband Store
A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
So she continues upward . The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth f loor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. (scroll and keep reading!)

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.
T he second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.

The chance of a piece of bread falling buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.    Murphy.